Abrahamic / Middle Eastern Christianity How to Choose Friends Wisely Share Flipboard Email Print Christianity Christian Life For Teens Christianity Origins The Bible The New Testament The Old Testament Practical Tools for Christians Christian Prayers Weddings Inspirational Bible Devotions Denominations of Christianity Funerals and Memorial Services Christian Holidays Christian Entertainment Key Terms in Christianity Catholicism Latter Day Saints View More By Kelli Mahoney Christianity Expert M.P.A., University of Illinois–Springfield B.S., Psychology and Criminal Justice, Illinois State University. Kelli Mahoney is a Christian youth worker and writer. She previously worked as an administrator for NXT, a high school Christian youth group. our editorial process Kelli Mahoney Updated December 31, 2018 Think you don't get to choose who you're friends with? You get just as much say who your friends are as they do. Making friends is one thing, but choosing who your friends are is incredibly important because your friends are your guides in life as well as the people who help define who you are. In some ways, they are family. Some friends are closer to you than others, but who you choose to share important parts of your life with matters. Choose a Friend Who is Honest People Images/Getty Images A friend that is honest is one of the best friends you can have. Trust and honesty are cornerstones in any relationship. Choosing a friend who can tell you how it is will be something you'll appreciate greatly (albeit, you may not always appreciate it in that particular moment, you'll look back on it and appreciate it later...really). An honest friend will keep you from walking out of the house wearing that awful green shirt or tell you that the girl you're going to ask out isn't interested. They're supportive in their honesty, and you should choose someone you know will not lie. Choose a Friend Who Gets Your Quirks, Oddities, and Weird Sense of Humor Friends need to laugh together. We like our good times in life, and sometimes the best times come from our own odd character traits. Choose a friend who gets those quirks and can laugh with you rather than at you. After all, if you choose a friend who gets your odd sense of humor, it's likely they have one, too. Look for someone who will laugh with you at a look or a glance. Those people will be some of your best friends. They don't put you down for the things that make you different; they embrace them! Choose a Friend Who Stands By You in the Tough Times It's so easy for us to be good friends in the fun times. There's all kinds of laughter and joyful moments, and those times make relationships easy. But who are the people who stand by you when times turn tough? Those are your true friends. Those are the people that get that life doesn't always go the way we plan. It's much harder to stand by someone that's having a tough time, so choosing a friend that is strong enough to be the shoulder to cry on or hold your hand when it's needed is a wise choice. Choose a Friend Who Gives as Much as They Take We've all had friends that only want things from us, but they never seem willing to give to us when we need it. Relationships involve compromise. Sometimes you're going to do what your friend wants to do, even though it's not quite your thing, and sometimes she is going to do what you want to do, even though it's not quite their thing. When a relationship is one-sided, we end up feeling resentful and angry. It's not healthy. Choose a friend with whom you feel a balance of give and take. Choose a Friend Who Gets Your Faith is Important Your faith is important to you, so why choose a friend who puts it down at every chance they get? If your friends are pulling you away from God, are they really your friends? Not likely. A true friend, whether they believe what you do or not, will support your choice to be a Christian. It tends to be why Christians often choose other Christian friends because they want to be with people that help them stay on a Christian path. Choose a Friend Who Likes the Things You Do While friendship is full of compromise, it helps if you choose friends who share a lot of your interests. It gives you things to talk about or share. It makes deciding on stuff to do easier. You don't have to choose a friend who likes every single little thing you do, but you should have some shared interests.